At least that's my fantasy. In fact, the reality may not be that (or this, whichever) far off. Well, maybe not a swat team and maybe there wouldn't be a whole nest of bandits involved, but there is a recently renamed software product that promises pretty much that.

Absolute Software's LoJack for Laptops used to be called CompuTrace, and now it's back with a new name and a new identity. It's also in some respects a little scary. More on that in a moment.

Meanwhile, I did spend some time playing with LoJack for Laptops. The folks at Absolute Software delivered a disk to my office and, after a few glitches having to do with my outdated laptop software, I successfully installed it, made the appropriate calls to an 800-number in Vancouver, British Columbia. And lo and behold, they told me just where my laptop was located.

"At the beginning, we wondered whether law enforcement would really care about laptops," Livingston confessed. "But they were very supportive. Property theft is a situation where they don't get a lot of success. But this is stolen property with a built-in electronic tip where it's located. They also realized that, in 5 per cent of the cases, the location they go to other criminal activity is taking place."

Last month, for instance, a distress call came from a laptop in McKinney, Texas. The local police stumbled onto a big chop-shop location with drugs and weapons. They also got the stolen computer back.

This is also one tough little piece of software. LoJack for Laptops-Absolute licensed the Lojack name from the car theft recovery company-can survive the entire stripping and reformatting of the hard disk. And, to make it even more invulnerable, most of the big laptop makers-IBM/Lenovo, Dell, Hewlett-Packard and Gateway-have just begun embedding a recovery chip on their system boards, so that even if the thief replaces the hard drive, the computer will still be able to make that SOS call.

Sounds a little like Arnold Schwarzenegger in The Terminator. You can almost hear the computer growling, "I'll be baaaack."

Which is where a few little concerns come in.

Load it onto your laptop, and it dials into a computer in Vancouver, it logs you (or anyone else) on, registers your computer's serial number and who you are along with a password. Then, you sit back and wait for it to be stolen.

If that happens, that's when the "recovery team" kicks into action. Those are the go-to people. If your computer does walk out of your office, hotel room or the trunk of your car, you simply call the 800-number, or go to another computer, and report it stolen. Within seconds, your computer goes on Absolute Software's "most wanted" list.

It works like a charm, as soon as the bandits use your stolen laptop to go online. By the way, all the time your computer's been sitting in your office or den, it has been regularly checking in with its master in Vancouver. If the computer gets into the wrong hands and is reported stolen, Absolute's recovery team will see that status pop up on their screen.

Within seconds, Absolute can use one of three ways to determine where the wayward computer has gone. If it's a dial-up modem, it can tell what phone number the computer is using to get online, and trace the address. If it's broadband, it can track the IP address and then, with cooperation from the Internet Service Provider, locate the street address where the IP is installed. And then there's a third way that even John Livingston, Absolute's chairman and CEO won't tell us about.

Now that's great, if you don't want your last five years' tax returns falling into the hands of a greedy whistle-blower. But, despite Livingstone's assurances, I was a little worried about just how much Tania in Absolute's recovery department was able to see on my hard drive back there in Vancouver.

Finally, there still isn't a version for Apple Macintosh computers, at least not a consumer version, though there is a corporate product. Absolute says one will be forthcoming by year's end.

And, when we tried to install the software on my wife's ancient Dell laptop, it didn't take to Windows98 operating system. There is a version that works on Windows98, but you (or them) have to get it straight from the Web site. Type www.lojackforlaptops.com. There'll be someone out there listening!

The Cingular 8525 is a Cingular exclusive. Among all its features, the 8525 has (obviously) a phone - with all the possible bells and whistles one could fit into a mobile phone package; speaker phone, bluetooth, wired handsfree, voice dialing, and of course the phonebook. A decent 2 Mega pixel camera is on the back that like does still pictures and video as well. A small LED flash supplies some illumination for dark spaces, but it works best in natural light. Messaging (email as well as SMS text messages), a full HTML browser that supports most Javascript, WiFi support, InfraRed IR support, USB, Bluetooth of course, and can even work as a USB tethered or IR wireless modem for laptops. The 8525 even works as an MP3 player with the Windows Mobile Media Player built in. Internal speakers provide a mini-boom box, or use the included wired stereo headphones, or add-on bluetooth headsets for stereo listening. A micro SD memory storage card slot allows easy expansion of precious memory.

Transferring music files is easy, just plug in the USB cable (or use Infra Red IR if your computer supports that, or Bluetooth); install the drivers/client software on the desktop, and copy files directly over. The software (Microsoft Active Sync) also does syncronizations for data files and Outlook mail, if you require that feature.

As with any mobile device, the Cingular 8525 has two weaknesses - MEMORY and POWER. Unlike a regular computer, the pocket PC does not have a hard disk drive to dump files onto. It uses memory (RAM in computer terms). Although it is RAM the contents are non-volatile, that is, data is not lost when power goes out. The 8525 pocket PC uses the memory as its storage medium instead of a hard drive. Internal memory consists of read-only and read-write parts, the read-only part is the operating system - the read-write part is where programs and data files are stored.

The internal memory is only sufficient for basic usage - you absolutely NEED extra memory in the form of a micro SD memory storage card. A memory manager tool in the Windows Mobile operating system allows you to monitor the size and usage of the memory (both fixed memory as well as the add-on memory card).

The Mobile Internet Explorer IE browser is a full HTML browser that can show virtually any webpage. Granted, one is limited by the screen resolution given the size of the screen, but scrollbars and a four-way keypad make it easy to get around the large web pages. Most simple javascript does work, but not crazy scripts or DHTML fancy shmancy pages. Images are scaled down to the screen size so viewing them takes some squinting, but it is an acceptable down side. The browser supports Desktop mode where it attempts to render the web page as-is; or a column mode where it attempts to fit things in compact columns (though sometimes it makes the webpage appear strange); and a default option that does a best guess arrangement which actually does work the best for most websites.

Why buy both a PDA and an iPod MP3 player? The Cingular 8525 does it all, the built in Windows Mobile Media Player allows you to play virtually any music file.

Bluetooth is the biggest power hog, it drains the battery the most. Shutting off Bluetooth handsfree devices when not required is a good habit. This is a sad fact for all mobile devices, not just the Cingular 8525.

WiFi is another drain on the battery. In most areas Cingular offers the 3G or EDGE wireless data connection with unlimited usage plans - making WiFi redundant. However, if you keep "borrowing" your neighbor's unsecured WiFi feed, it will drink up your battery juice real fast.

The 3G/EDGE transmitter is also a big power drain. Excessive surfing or constant email checking will run down your battery. Its fine to check the news or sports scores or your email during boring meetings, or on the bus/train commute - but it is not designed for around the clock usage. Also, if your signal strength drops to below 2 bars (low signal), your phone has to shout louder which drains more power. You can disconnect the 3G connection by tapping the G icon, tap DISCONNECT - the phone transmitter will fall back to cellular (lower power consumption).

Overall, the Cingular 8525 scores an 11 out of 10 - yes, this little thing is incredible, and is resoundingly recommended!

While the 8525 device does have a camera, its main function is a Pocket PC. The camera has reasonable quality given this fact, but it does have a plethora of quirks. The focusing leaves a lot to be desired, on 2M picture mode (the largest resolution) the focusing is virtually non-functional. A tiny lever around the lens switches from NORMAL to MACRO mode, it provides some level of focusing but is totally inadequate. In addition, there is no zoom in 2 Meg mode. This means the 2M mode is unusable for most practical purposes, and even the 1M mode has focusing problems, although one level of zoom is available (2X).

At S(mall), M(edium) and L(arge) modes, focusing works reasonably well and progressively larger zooming is available. Still, that NORMAL/MACRO lever around the lens is constantly getting nudged around (it sticks out) and one has to keep checking to ensure it is in the right place before taking any pictures.

Another quirk with the 8525 video camera is the format that it saves. Video files are saved with a .MP4 extension. RealPlayer and Microsoft Media Player are able to playback these videos, but other mobile devices (such as Sony Ericsson) don't understand it. The options screen for the 8525 video camera do have a selection for video formats - however only MP4 is listed there. Future Windows Mobile updates or Cingular updates may provide additional video formats for saving (such as MPEG).

Pictures and videos taken on the 8525 pocket PC PDA can, obviously, be seen on its own screen - and can easily be transferred to other devices/desktops. When using the ActiveSync syncronization software, the media files can simply be copied over to the desktop PC over USB, InfraRed (IR) or Bluetooth.

When the camera detects a memory card, it cleverly asks if you wish to store pictures there - say YES. The still camera modes are weird, the image of the camera is the regular mode for normal pictures. Check the user manual for details on the other modes, if you ever plan on using them. The LED flash is virtually useless unless you are right next to the subject, it just drains your battery.

The picture quality is reasonable, outdoor (and well lit) images are better than indoor (unlit) images. Again, the Cingular 8525 ain't no high end camera - its a fantastic pocket PC that just happens to have a convenient camera built in.

In addition, images and videos can be sent to others by email or MMS (if a suitable data plan permits it). But for the kid within us who loves to play with toys - the 8525 pocket PC also allows you to BEAM the image over Bluetooth to any other compatible Bluetooth mobile device within range! While it would be fun to send weird pictures to total strangers, it is probably more fun (and safer) to send it to someone you know. The recipient will have to accept the connection before the image or video is actually sent. Its a quick and easy way to share photos and videos on-the-fly with other family members that are also Bleutooth equipped.